love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
