and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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