I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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