just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Boobs speak an international language.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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