it wasn't lemon gatorade
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
God, I missed his penis.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
