Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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