Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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