The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
