I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
