remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
