I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Mom said you looked used
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I had to cum in my sink.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
