Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Randomize
