It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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