Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
