After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I will pee on everything he values.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Randomize
