in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
