Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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