i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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