That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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