i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
