I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize