exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
