My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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