Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
