when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize