ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Randomize
