sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize