Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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