party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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