What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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