i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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