tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize