i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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