idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Holy sore nipples Batman
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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