All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Randomize