You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
