Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
