I feel like I'm in dance class right now
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
