fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
