Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
