So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
