Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
