I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
