I must be too annoying 4 u.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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