why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
