I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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