no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
he's single and there are thong briefs.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
