it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
