I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
