i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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